The burnout gateway to cosy content
It’s come to my attention that I’m burnt out, which is not a clinical diagnosis. If I went to a medical professional I’d probably be told I have mild depression and slightly less mild anxiety as a result of acute stress from my life choices. Also, the world is falling apart and everything is terrible and humanity is a disease. I’m not planning to go to a medical professional, though, because I’ve been here before and I know how to get out of it. Plus I’m foolhardy. In fact, I’m everything I accuse my parents of being. Or worse.
I used to run my own company and after 6 years I burned out hard. I felt unmotivated and talent-less, like a wastrel. I was convinced I was nothing but a parasite upon society. My lack of action and ambition filled me with self-loathing. I spiralled. I stopped doing things I loved (reading, writing, watching stuff), and things I knew made me happier (exercising, spending time with other humans). I felt trapped in my life. The way out turned out to be a new job, which led to a new community and a fresh perspective on my capabilities. In that instance, a change was as good as a holiday.
A fresh start may not be possible this time around (dependents, a mortgage, an iffy economic environment due to the global dumpster fire etc.), so the best option is to force myself to stop spiralling by continuing to do things I love and the things I know make me happy. Basically, I’m going to mindfully culturally consume my way out of this crisis. You are what you eat, after all.
Reading a book, writing a story or even watching a thought-provoking movie seems like a bridge too far for me right now, so I’m turning to cosy content.
Everyone has comforting stories they turn to in times of distress. For my sister it’s Parks and Recreation. For my niece it’s Modern Family.
I’m not really someone who re-watches things, even if I love them. That’s a lie, I will endlessly re-watch during the acute time stamp that marks my obsession, but once I’ve moved on I don’t spend a lot of time looking back. My need for cosy content sees me searching for new stuff that reminds me of things I’ve been comforted by in the past. So here’s what I’m watching right now that’s pulling me out of the pit of despair.
BTS on Hot Ones
It should be no surprise that my ultimate cosy content right now is BTS being goobers. Unfortunately most of this content is on social platforms and I need to avoid them at all costs while my brain is fragile. But maybe a little bit of YouTube is okay?
This episode of Hot Ones is a delightful showcase of BTS’ silliness and charm. It reminds me of the piece of content that sent me down the Bangtan rabbit hole in the first place: carpool karaoke. Also, it’s birthed a whole new era of BTS in-jokes and memes e.g. C’MON WING.
It’s probably my favourite thing from this comeback (aside from the album itself), followed closely by the Swimming Pool LIVE version of Swim, and the 2.0 music video.
Big Mistakes
We binged this new series in 3 days. There are things about it that are not remotely cosy, but Dan Levy both writes and stars in it, and those two facts are the emotional equivalent of a hot water bottle to me. Ever since the world fell in love with him and Schitt’s Creek during Covid, ‘Dan Levy’ is code for ‘safe space’ in my brain.
Even though this show is about two ordinary people being blackmailed into a life of organised crime, the character development feels well paced and emotionally honest. The plot becomes increasingly unhinged as the season progresses, but because of the trust the audience has in the characters, you’re able to laugh out loud at the ridiculous things that happen to them. It’s hilarious, silly, fun and affecting.
I can’t wait for Season 2.
Shrinking
This whole series reminds me of Season 1 of Ted Lasso, which is not a huge surprise given the two series have a writer in common: Brett Goldstein. The banter is sparkling, so much so that I find myself wishing I could project myself into the midst of this wonderful ensemble. It’s like a modern multi-generational version of Friends. In some episodes the dialogue is so witty and quick as to stretch the limits of believability, but in a similar fashion to Big Mistakes, the emotional authenticity forms a narrative bedrock that can withstand almost anything.
The thing I love the most about this show, particularly when I’m feeling low, is that it deals with very heavy subjects in a light way — the main character is a shrink who’s spiralling after the sudden death of his wife in a car crash. When you first meet him, he’s a substance abuser who’s essentially become an absence in his own life — absent father, absent friend, absent therapist. You get to watch him make bad choices all the way to a better place. Another cool thing: you end up getting free therapy and plenty of useful (and evidence-based) coping strategies from it. Bonus.
We’re in the middle of Season 3 right now and I don’t want it to end. I think Harrison Ford deserves an Emmy. My cosy content sweet spot is things that make me laugh and cry in equal measure. Shrinking is perfect.
Kian’s Bizarre B&B
In my teens, I was pretty into reality TV — specifically Survivor and The Bachelor. The attachment hasn’t travelled with me into mid-life, I’ve never felt any curiosity about Love Island, Married at First Sight or Below Deck. But due to my K-culture deep dive, I have developed a taste for Korean reality and variety shows. Oh, and K-drama, but that’s a story for another day. I started watching Kian’s Bizarre B&B on my recent flight to Australia because I can’t engage with anything deep on a plane, and because it stars Kim Seokjin, my BTS bias-wrecker. Kian is a public figure, webtoon creator and off-beat comedic character in South Korea. Somehow he got the keys to a Netflix show which enabled him to draw up plans for an outrageous and silly B&B, and have people build it irl on a barge off of Ulleungdo Island. He convinced a cast of genuinely normal people to come along as guests, and hired ‘world star Jin from BTS’ to be the B&B’s manager, alongside a popular YouTuber, Ji Ye-eun.
It’s bizarre because Kian is bizarre. HIs B&B has a front door on the second floor that can only be reached by ascending a climbing wall. The exit is a slide. The beds are outdoors. The ground floor kitchen and dining area can only be reached by fireman’s pole. Guests must eat with their hands. Despite being a B&B, they serve dinner. It’s honestly hilarious and kind of stressful to watch in a low stakes kind of way. I didn’t expect the human connections to hit so hard. I didn’t expect to cry while watching this, but episode 5 got me good. It made me laugh and reflect on the preciousness and transience of life.
Last One Laughing
Here’s a bonus round because I haven’t watched this in full, but I have been served about 400 short snippets on TikTok. Nothing has made me laugh this hard in a long long long time. The premise is that a group of comedians are put in a room for 6 hours and told they aren’t allowed to laugh. Last one to break wins. I would pay very good money to see the New Zealand version of this.
Guess what? I feel better.
Maybe this plan will work.