She’s a mirrorball: mentally preparing for a new Taylor Swift era

We’re 30 minutes away from The Life of a Showgirl dropping and I’m having some emotionz that need to be processed. There are normal ones like excitement and anticipation, but I also have this feeling of being on the verge of tears. You know when you need to sneeze and your nose tickles and your eyes sting a little bit? That’s it.

I’ve been hovering on the periphery of the fandom’s mania all week, which is where I can usually be found tbh. I’m the sort of fan who knows about the puzzles and easter eggs but waits for someone else to solve them. A grifter fan? A lazy fan? Or maybe just a fan with a full time job and two kids. Whatever. I’m happy here.

I downloaded TikTok again just for the weekend because I want the full kaleidoscope of the rollout. I want the walk-throughs of the Spotify experience in New York, the Apple Music lyric treasure hunt, the incessant countdowns leading to new photographs. My favourite fan take so far: “TS is the only artist who can make millions of people countdown to what will inevitably be just a new photo of her looking hot.”

I’m booked to see TLOASG launch party at the cinema on Saturday afternoon with some friends. The stage is set. I’m prepared, but I feel like I didn’t emotionally connect to the idea of a new album until last night.

I was scrolling through TikTok and came across a reaction video. A Swiftie put her two parents in front of the screen and played them Marjorie. They’d both lost their own parents, and that song is about the loss of Taylor’s grandmother, so the reaction was as sweet as expected. I cried of course—not just a 🥹 but actual tears rolling down my cheeks. There are certain TS songs that do that to me every time: epiphany, bigger than the whole sky, Robin.

I’ve been a fan of Taylor since a country-music-loving ex-boyfriend introduced me to Fearless when I was 23. That’s a 16-year relationship, longer than I’ve known my husband. I appreciate that it’s not a real relationship but because of the way Taylor writes—how she’s built a narrative multi-verse that connects you to her story and also echoes your own life experiences—the connection I have with the concept of ‘Taylor Swift’ is very emotional. That’s why I blacked out a little during the Eras Tour (Eras amnesia is a thing).

She is one of very few artists that I can only listen to one whole album at a time which is rare in the streaming era (see also: Lorde and Neko Case). Each TS album is a universe that layers on top of those that came before. Within the albums, each song is a story world in itself. When I say that Taylor Swift music has no skips, I don’t mean they’re all my cup of tea, I mean each song adds to the solar system and therefore its presence can’t be questioned.

Her world is, of course, bigger than her music. She and BTS are the two best examples in pop right now of transmedia storytelling. She’s been sharing her multiverse across tumblr, Instagram, tiktok, twitter, interviews, video, live events, tours, poetry, lyrics and more for almost 20 years. There’s too much to cover in one go. This will probably be a multi-part series.

So here’s what’s occupying my thoughts as I wait for TS12 to hit: what is she going to tell me, and how is it going to make me feel? 🥶

I’ve been trying to categorise the TS multiverse, and I’ve settled on eight narrative worlds: fairytales, heartbreak, betrayal, autofiction, self-reflection, true stories, character-driven stories, fan stories.

My favourite is autofiction.

I don’t know her, but I strongly suspect Taylor is a theatre kid to her core. She doesn’t just build stories but communicates them with drama and emotion — her music feels like a blend of pop and musical theatre sometimes. It’s not just in the words but the delivery.

She’s also a self-confessed people pleaser who is very aware of public opinion, and some of her most famous songs play into that: Shake it off. Look what you made me do. etc.

All the promo for TLOASG has made me think about this ☝️ video where she explains the inspiration for Blank Space and then performs it with characteristic theatrical commitment. This track is in my top 5 pop songs of all time, and the thing that’s most interesting about it is how meta it is. This is Taylor Swift writing a song from the perspective of a fictional version of herself that the world has invented through public discourse. It’s a very sticky version of Taylor, the one that most of her haters cling to.

I’m hoping and expecting the new album to be very much in this vein. She’s returned to the same producer collaboration (Max Martin and Shellback), and she’s thematically focused on the time period when she was running the largest and most successful tour of all time, Eras. This was 2 years when she was pretty much constantly visible. She went through the break up of a long term relationship, chased it with a very messy re-bound, then lived out her teenage dreams by falling in love with a football player—and she did this pretty much all in public on the Eras stage.

She made billions of dollars and had millions of fans tuning into grainy livestreams every night tracking every outfit change and vocal ad lib. She released 3 albums during this time (two re-records and TTPD - an album she herself nicknamed ‘female rage: the musical’).

It must have been an insane experience, and this album is how she’s processed it. I’m afraid. In a good way.